Russel Brand

Apparently, having previously taken drugs, a stupid hairstyle, a legion of vacuous Big Brother-obsessed media student fans and having sex with a lot of groupies and being a wilfully self-absorbed and ignorant cock – and shouting about it – is all you need to be a comedian these days.

Oh, but he refers to his penis as his “dingle-dangle” or something, and that’s obviously hilarious.

Go away, you tedious and offensive little man. The world was better without you.

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