Someone asked me for an abridged version of the Bible. So I wrote this.
If you’re a Truly Reformed type or have otherwise had a sense of humour bypass and might not see the funny side in this, or if you’re going to pick theological holes in what is clearly a silly spoof, please don’t bother reading this or leaving any comments or anything. I really can’t be bothered.
GOD: Let there be Stuff!
[There is Stuff. Some of it doesn’t work.]
GOD: You suck! Follow these rules!
[They don’t]
GOD: Alright, here’s my son to teach you how to do it properly
[They kill him]
GOD: Aha! But by killing my son you’ve gained eternal life because of a loophole!
[People don’t really get it]
GOD: Oi, you. Here’s a vision of the end of time.
John: How do you expect me to write *that* down?
GOD: Just, y’know, do your best.
[He writes Revelation. No-one, including God, understands it]
THE END