Someone asked me for an abridged version of the Bible. So I wrote this.

If you’re a Truly Reformed type or have otherwise had a sense of humour bypass and might not see the funny side in this, or if you’re going to pick theological holes in what is clearly a silly spoof, please don’t bother reading this or leaving any comments or anything. I really can’t be bothered.

GOD: Let there be Stuff!

[There is Stuff. Some of it doesn’t work.]

GOD: You suck! Follow these rules!

[They don’t]

GOD: Alright, here’s my son to teach you how to do it properly

[They kill him]

GOD: Aha! But by killing my son you’ve gained eternal life because of a loophole!

[People don’t really get it]

GOD: Oi, you. Here’s a vision of the end of time.

John: How do you expect me to write *that* down?

GOD: Just, y’know, do your best.

[He writes Revelation. No-one, including God, understands it]

(via JV, via UA, via, uh, me)

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