I’ve had this bumbling round in my head for a while, and iMonk‘s post on a broadly similar subject has prompted me to get my arse into gear and write about it. It’s kind of a tricky subject, and some people aren’t going to like it, but please, hear me out.

See, now, here’s the deal: I don’t like Evangelism. There, I’ve said it. Stone me now.

Now, if you’re a Christian from the same sort of background as me, you’re probably thinking something along the lines of: “Well, yes, it’s scary doing that whole sharing your faith thing, telling people about God and Jesus and how they need to be saved and that.” And yes, it is. I know, I’ve done a lot of it (and quite often made a fool of myself in the process). But that’s not what I mean. I mean that I am deeply uncomfortable with the whole idea of Evangelism; or at least, with the way we’re supposed to be going about it.

Now, part of this stems from the fact that yes, I am shy and no, I don’t like imposing myself on people (unless I’ve had a few beers, in which case I get all mouthy and ranting, but by that point I’m usually past my best for discussing theology anyway). And it also partially stems with that sort of gut postmodern fluffy moral relativist feeling I’ve got in my stomach that makes me wonder if I’ve really got any sort of right at all to go around telling people what to believe.

But the really serious thing is – I have doubts. It’s a dirty word, but every Christian does. Those who don’t are either lying or crazy. I have questions to which I don’t know the answers – important questions, too, not just little issues of dogma or liturgy. And these questions and doubts are important – they are not little issues to be swept under the rug and turned over to scriptural dogmatics or dismissed with a shrug and a “Well, we can’t know the mind of God”. They are things that need to be wrestled with, talked about openly and honestly and thought deeply about – and we also need to be open to the fact that many things will still continue to be without an answer; but, like an imponderable Zen Koan, it is more important that we think about these things that actually arrive at an answer.

My faith, therefore, is a journey; a dialogue, if you will. It’s been going on for a lot longer than that day, 10 years ago, when I gave my life to Christ (to use a deeply loaded and confusing phrase) – although that was clearly a hugely important milestone along the way – and it will continue on for a lot longer than where I am today. It is a fluid thing – as my dialogue with others (corporeal entities or otherwise) continues, my beliefs will continue to change, to be moulded by my experience. And it is that journey, far more than the final destination, that is the important thing.

I can’t, therefore, go out and tell someone that they’ve got to believe what I do otherwise they’re going to burn in hell/suffer the torment of eternal separation/be moody forever because they don’t like the afterlife, because I am not that dogmatically sure that I want people to believe the same as I do, and I really hope I never do reach the point where I am so sure I have all the right answers that I am willing to sit on my big fat theologcal arse and go no further. Therefore, to preach a definitive “recipe for salvation” – which I have done in the past – would be deceptive on my part.

There is an important caveat, though. And that is the fact that I do still have the beliefs I have and, if they are true, then some things do demand some kind of response, because they have profound implications for the way this world we live in works.

So. I am unwilling to beat people over the head with a Bible, to tell them that their soul is damned and that unless they turn to Christ they will suffer eternal separation from God. I am unwilling to sell the idea of a simple quick-fix Jesus to solve all your emotional, spiritual and physical needs. But I would encourage people to be open and honest, to be aware of their own journey, and, more specfically, to listen to the claims made in the Bible and to consider taking them seriously. I would hope that, as part of my journey, my everyday actions can become more of an ambassador for my beliefs than dogmatic preaching could ever be. And if that means I can stir a few hearts and minds and set a few people off in a new direction on their own journeys, then that must be a good thing, right?

This entry was posted on Friday, June 17th, 2005 at 3:41 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.